I too love It’s Complicated and like you I wonder if there is a Steve Martin out there for me
Yeah, I never, ever made my wife feel like she wasn’t as educated as I was. She tells everyone that she hopes our children turn out like me! I think you’re right in saying she used this argument to justify her feelings towards me and justify the EA. I’m not sure if she was re-evaluating her life, but she was definitely re-evaluating our marriage and she “felt” there had to be a better way. Thankfully she realized that she always had what she was wishing for, just too blind to see. As she says “the grass isn’t greener”.
Xterra, sorry to have to see you on this board, but it kissbrides.com pГЎgina seguinte is a great place of support. Glad to see you guys are able to work on it. It is hard but gaining the insight of others on this board has been invaluable to me.
I totally agree EG! It’s only been 3 months since I found out about the EA, but find that the info and advice have been invaluable in helping me heal, as well as helping my wife.
Good point! Yes, I have often been given a completely different perspective by things I read on here, and then can share with my husband.
Yes because that is the acceptable cliche right? When bad things happen we try to explain it away. And them going for a better person than us makes total sense to everyone including the betrayed, Yes if that person were better then we could accept some of the blame and fix it. We have to keep reinforcing, it’s not us, it’s them that are broken or stupid or both.
I think we value our relationships, vows and the act of loving
I’m choosing to stay (ULK again) because I do see remorse, shame, a sincere change. BUT I’ve changed too and he isn’t liking that too much in some regard. I do not mother what so ever any more. I used to be a great cook. DONE. His closets were totally organized. NOPE. He better damn well check in with me before committing to a golf date! AND I’m FIRST. WHOOOOHOOOO. So ok can you so visualize this 50 something dressed up with heels, her whip and whistle “I said get it up. “CRACK the whip “Ve have vays of making you perform!” LOL I crack myself up! OK nothing that far I just make sure he KNOWS I may be old but I’m not dead. Yes if I were to leave I would have no problem finding another maybe better person to spend the rest of my life with. My sons tell me their friends call me a MILF which I had to ask what that was and was totally embarrassed when they explained. Too old to be that but at my age I will take a compliment wherever I can get it! I have numerous qualities that would be appreciated. Did you see the movie “It’s Complicated” with Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin and Meryl Streep? AB is the ex husband and he pretends like he’s changed and wants to get back with MS. In the beginning she likes the attention and they have a lot of sexual hysterical bonding. The ex, AB, seems genuinely changed but we know he isn’t he just wants back with “mama”.Then she meets Steve Martin who offers something totally new and fresh and fun and respectful. I keep thinking maybe there’s a Steve I doing wasting my time with this lying, cheating, bastard that I am with now. Because I’m a chicken shit probably.
TH – the visions of the dominator had me cracking up. I adore the croissant making scene. It’s so grown-up and sincere. AB is an impetuous buffoon – much like my H. It infuriates me that I find that attractive. I don’t think you (or any of us BS) are chicken shit. I tell myself better to have loved deeply than not at all. I’m glad I walk in my shoes and not my H’s. I couldn’t face myself if I made those ridiculous choices. No wonder the are so angry, evasive and withdrawn during the affair. Unless your a serial cheating dirt bag you have to feel truly crappy about yourself everyday even if for only a second. So know that you like the others on here are my heroes. Each of you and your stories give me the strength to feel not alone and positive about myself. Long live the whip cracking MILF! LOL.