If you find yourself in need of some timely advice and reminders on relationships, here are 10 wise and practical tips to build strong, healthy relationships with your loved one
Relationships are some of the most complex things we face as human beings. Which actually makes complete sense since it involves two separate, different people with varying beliefs, thoughts and backgrounds. It takes real work to maintain our relationships, many of us do it willingly because more often than not, these connections make an ineffable value and fulfilment to our life.
That being said, although we may understand that maintaining relationships require effort, many of us get busy with life and may lose our way, or even just get stuck in a rut. Over the last year, we’ve spoken to many professionals on relationship advice as well as researched online and here is what we have found to be the key themes to maintaining a healthy, balanced relationship. All situations and relationships are completely unique and different, so there is no one size fits all and manual to ‘life’, these are just the commons pointers and discussion points that come up regularly.
The number 1 classic advice for relationships is effective communication. Many of us assume our partners know exactly what we want and what we like, especially for those who are in a long-term relationship. Well, the truth is, none of us can read minds. Proactively sharing our thoughts, opinions and feelings to our partners instead of expecting them to predict what we want, is one of the key ways to maintain a healthy, balanced relationship.
Top 10 advice for healthy, long-lasting relationships
Clinical psychologist, Shelley Sommerfeldt, explains that communication is essential in relationships because it builds trust and connection. In order for both parties to feel heard and understood, couples need to first create an environment that is safe, supportive, accepting, and loving so that both sides can really open up and be vulnerable in front of the other.
Sometimes when life sweeps us up in a bunch of activities, work and obligations, we tend to neglect our relationships by leaving it on the back burner and the bottom of the to-do list. While this may be inevitable at times, relationships don’t grow themselves – they need frequent doses of attention, love and care to blossom. Like watering a plant essentially, it isn’t going to water itself.
And no, we don’t mean that you need to profess your love to your partner in grand gestures every day. Terri Orbuch, author of 5 Simple Steps to take Your Marriage from Good to Great and professor at Oakland University, suggests saying and doing small, simple expressions of gratitude every day for your loved one – hug, kiss, hold hands, fix a favourite dessert, or put gas in the car. Sometimes, it’s really the little things that make the most impact. So take intentional time out of your everyday routine to shower your partner with their preferred love language and make them feel recognized as special and appreciated, it will go a long way for your relationship.
This might seem like a no-brainer, but being around each other every day is not the same thing as being present for your partner. Being truly present for the other person entails active listening, which means that you process and engage with what the other party is saying and pick up on the emotions and feelings they’re trying to communicate, as well as showing genuine empathy about the things and events that they’re sharing with you. Adamaris Mendoza, licensed psychotherapist and relationship coach, advocates for mindfulness as a fantastic tool for creating and maintaining happy, healthy relationships. Being present allows you to be on the same page as your other half, empathise with them, and that can do a lot to strengthen your bond and teamwork between the two of you.